Following Directions

The Directions

If a student is exempt from the Final Exam leave the two astericks in the cell and the exam will not be calcualated into their Final Grade

Teacher: Ok, my grades are in

IT Guy: Congratulations

Teacher: I think I did them all right

IT Guy: You are so kind

Teacher: Is it OK that I put an X in the Final Exam column for exempt students?

IT Guy: No, you are suppose to leave the astericks. Did you see the directions?

Teacher: Yeah.  But I like the X’s

IT Guy: Are you serious?

Teacher: Why can’t I put an X?

IT Guy: I have no idea, that is how the software was made.  Why does it matter?

Teacher: I like X. It means exempt.

IT Guy: Actually it means the kid got an X on his Final Exam.  Additionally, why does X mean exempt?  Why not EX?

Teacher: X is faster.

IT Guy: It sure is.  You are genius!

Teacher: So should I change it back?  Or should we just see it works?

IT Guy: Unless you want to explain to the parents why their Final Grades are algebraic expressions please follow the directions without editing them for efficiency and/or stupidity.

How do they get these jobs?

Story submitted by another IT Guy.  He feels my pain.

Teacher: The computer is dark, and wont come on. What is wrong?

IT Guy: Do you see any lights on the computer?

Teacher: No, what do I do?

IT Guy: Turn it on?

Teacher: Okay, that fixed it, thanks!

This little piggy broke my computer?

Teacher: Help, Help, Help!  My grades were do 2 hours ago and I can’t turn my computer on.

IT Guy: Explain

Teacher: I keep getting this message:  Attempting to boot from USB device

IT Guy: Do you have a Flash drive in your computer

Teacher: Not that I can see

IT Guy: Did you look?

Teacher: Will you just come down????

IT Guy: Sure

———————————————-

Teacher: See…it won’t boot

IT Guy: I thought you checked for a Flash drives

Teacher: I did

IT Guy: Then what is this….?

Teacher: Oh, that’s my pig

IT Guy: IT’S A FLASH DRIVE!

Teacher: Oh, yeah.  I must have missed it

IT Guy: Yeah……lots of things on the computer look like little pig heads.

 

 

Computer Should be Able to Do that #2

Secretary: We have some holds to be placed on student accounts.  We need to block some users from viewing online grades till the hold is lifted

IT Guy:
Sure.  Send me a list

Secretary:
Can we just turn off the whole school and I will tell you who to turn back on?

IT Guy: What?  You want me to turn off the entire school?

Secretary:
Yes.

IT Guy:
Why?

Secretary:
So I don’t have to make a spreadsheet

IT Guy:
You want me to block the entire school…..then reinstate almost the entire school………so you don’t have to make a spreadsheet?

Secretary: Yeah, the computer should be able to do that……. 

IT Guy:  Well it can’t…….but people that work in offices SHOULD be able to make spreadsheets. In the mean time I will email support and see if they can build a button that blocks 5% of users and functions via telepathy