Teachers Strike Back

Teacher submitted Story:While I empathize with the trials of an IT support person to handle the idiocies of faculty from the other side of the digital divide, I must say it is not just teachers who posses the unique power to test the patience of those of us who happen to know where the power button is located. Without further ado, my best “I fear for the future” stories:

 

1. Student: “Why do we have to double space? It looks hella bad.”
    Me: Why are you putting two spaces between each word?


2. Student: (very seriously)what kind of car did Shakespeare drive? (she was 15)


3. Student: My links in PowerPoint won’t click.
    Me: Did you remember to press -enter- after?


4. Upon working in a classroom next to a cell phone jammer, the kids freaked out:
Kid: (bangs cell phone against desk)
Other kid:is this a terrorist attack.

 

So teachers+ kids= 🙁

……and the teachers are on the board.

Students 2 – Teachers-1

New Printer Not Working

Teacher: “IT Guy, the printer you just installed doesn’t work….what’s wrong?”

IT Guy: “Did you put paper in it?”

Teacher: “Oh, no……I didn’t think of that”

IT Guy: ” Of course you didn’t…….why would you when you can run over here and tell me.

VCR and the Regurgitated Food Spot

Student: Can you come down, Mrs. ***** needs help
IT Guy: Is it 10am already?  Ok.
Teacher: I need the VCR to work
IT Guy: Did you turn it on?
Teacher: I tried
IT Guy: And?
Teacher: I’m not going to be here tomorrow
IT Guy: What does that have to do with anything?
Teacher: I want to make sure it works
IT Guy: IS IT ON?
Teacher: I don’t know
IT Guy: (Pushes on button) It was off
Teacher: What did you push?
IT Guy: The ON button
Teacher: Oh, I thought it was this smudge here?  See?
IT Guy: You thought that smudge was the ON button?  For real?
Teacher: Yeah, it looks like a button
IT Guy: No it doesn’t.  It looks someone spit up chewed potato chips on it.  Why would you even touch that?
Teacher: Well you fixed it.  You have the magical touch
IT Guy: I just turned it on.
Teacher: Thanks again for fixing it
IT Guy: Ok. Next time hit the ON button instead of the regurgitated food spot.

Storage Bin

IT : phone rings* IT this is….

College staff: Someone deleted my trash folder in my email

IT: Yes trashed gets purged every 30days

College staff: But I store my files in there ?!

Fix it yet?

Of my many pet peeves pertaining to teachers “Fix it yet?” is among the top.  Teachers need constant updates on the status of computer repairs.  You would think the mere fact that I am sitting in their classroom would suggest the issue is not corrected but regardless they pepper me with questions in regular intervals.  For example, the following is a pretty standard “Fix it yet?” interaction.

 

Teacher: Hey, IT Guy……..my computer is broken.
IT Guy: Shocking

Teacher: Can you fix it?
IT Guy: I’ll give it a go.

40 seconds pass…. 
 


Teacher: Fix it yet?
IT Guy: Nope.

Teacher: Do you know what’s wrong with it

IT Guy: No, it is still booting up….go away.

57.4 seconds pass


Teacher: Fix it yet?
IT Guy: NO!
Teacher: Told you it wasn’t me.
IT Guy: Actually, I’m almost certain you caused the……
Teacher: Yep, not me…..

90 seconds later

Teacher: So you got it fixed yet?
IT Guy: Yep, fixed it along time ago…..I was just so enthralled by your lecture on proper typing posture that I wanted to stay and learn as much as possible…….
Teacher: (Makes dumb face)
IT Guy: NO, IT’S NOT FIXED YET!
Teacher: Oh, Ok.