This is a document I created, called "Inevitbale Computer Issues", to help teachers setup their computers when they first come back to school. It almost got me fired.
Teacher: Why is the office closed?
IT Guy: They leave at 1:00
Teacher: But it’s only 1:30
IT Guy: What?
Teacher: It’s only 1:30……do they pack right up and leave?
IT Guy: I would…….to avoid having conversations like this.
Teacher: That’s kind of ridiculous
IT Guy: Just to confirm. It is ridiculous that you, a person who does not work in the summer, sat at home until the office was closed then came to school and expected them to be here waiting for you………or that they are not here 30 minutes after closing time?
Teacher: You are a jerk
IT Guy: I know……and you are making me regret I didn’t leave at closing time……or as you call it “early”.
Office Worker: Do you know if this kid’s grade is right?
IT Guy: How would I know his grade? I am not his teacher
Office Worker: Just tell me his grade
IT Guy: How the hell would I know his grade?
Office Worker: Well you do the grades don’t you.
IT Guy: Yes, I do. What I don’t do is memorize the 6,300 grades that pass through my computer. I understand you are very impressed with my ability to sort things in Excel but that does not make me the freaking Rain Man
Office Worker: So how do I find his grade if you don’t know it?
IT Guy: ASK HIS TEACHER!!!!!!!!!!
Office Worker: Fine, I’ll try it.